Regina's Reflections

Dear Caregivers...
How on earth do you all do it?

Please all caregivers…. Enlighten me on this one simple question……

How in the world do you manage to:

Care for your children

Find reliable child care

Care for /manage husband / boyfriend / girlfriend

Always look well-groomed and dressed

And finally; perform amazingly well as a professional caregiver????

Seriously …HOW???

For a mere THREE DAYS, Tom, I and Darcey cared for a 3-year-old while her mom and dad were busy having a baby. Due to Covid precautions, my friend Angie and her husband Ray, remained in the hospital for 3 days.

A bit of background: Angie Amegashi began as a caregiver with us in 2014.

directly from Ghana, and lived in an apartment with several other caregivers... A Gold mine!

Angie was smart, caring, mature for her age, hard working with a great deal of common sense. I liked her immediately and placed her on a case. We started her on hourly then a few short live in cases, some hospice cases then finally a long-term live in. All Angie’s clients enjoyed her. She was rarely without a case. Then for two weeks a few years ago I hired her to help me following knee surgery. I experienced first-hand her special care. WOW ! Immediately I decided she would become a become a nurse! She began with pre-nursing classes, did well, then became pregnant.

Stay the course, was my advice. Babies are adaptable. Study around them. Her daughter Mishelle arrived in June 2017.

Angie then left our company but we remained friends. Mishelle and Darcey, both the same age also became best buddies. Seeking more full-time employment she worked nights in a nursing home while her husband cared for Mishelle. I am learning that many of our caregivers get very little sleep when juggling children, work, especially off shift work.

In the nursing home, she applied for scholarships, bonuses etc. to help with nursing school costs. I gently encouraged and assured her she would survive all the science courses, which of course she did, showing off and taking TWO the same semester.

Angie and I met up every few weeks for play dates with Darcey and Mishelle. We discussed her work, school and future plans.

She became pregnant with her second baby in 2020… A BOY!

Seeking people she could trust to care for Mishelle while she was in hospital, she turned to Tom and me and we immediately agreed…

How hard could it be ?? We had no idea. It all began with a phone call at 3 AM Angie was in labor. Rushing to their house, Ray and Tom packing the car, me monitoring contractions (verdict: NOT false labor) and Mishelle over joyed to be staying with Darcey. By 8 am her new brother RJ had arrived. She was not impressed, instead asked if she could eat breakfast with Darcey.

And we were off! Kites in hand, balls to throw to Darcey, we headed to a lovely state forest in Litchfield, Topsmeade. Kites flying, caught in trees. No Mishelle, NO CLIMBING. The girl who never flew a kite was suddenly a pro! Balls thrown to Darcey, Mishelle running with her. Beautiful afternoon more enjoyable with a child. Open fields were irresistible to a city girl and her best dog friend.

Tired (only the adults) we climbed back into the car, in search of ice cream shops. Successful at last, girl and dog, covered with ice cream, fast asleep.

Home, checking out our lake, deemed it too cold to swim, played with our boats, dinner on deck, fed fries to Darcey. Bubble bath, story time then girl and dog fast asleep.

Grownups totally exhausted.

Next day, shopping for new sneakers, clothes, books, Miss Mishelle had little interest in shopping even though it was for HER.

Garden day, helped with watering, hole digging, planting. The girl’s got potential! Tour of area farms, fascinating. Then back to the forest, except it was cold and rainy. Didn’t bother her a bit. New shoes…ran like the wind.

Then ice cream... REALLY?? It’s freezing out It’s raining. No matter.

Tom and Mishelle enjoying ice cream while I froze.

Now we are into a routine… Outside, dog play, shop, eat, bubble bath, bedtime stories, child and dog collapse. Adults too.

Recovering at night I cannot help but reflect on our caregivers

I am simply amazed! Every day endlessly moving children, demanding, needing time, food, clothes, play and Remote Learning??? Where does that fit in??

Time for yourself? Unthinkable. Time to relax? No such thing..

And add WORKING at an important job outside the home.

I CANNOT IMAGINE... EVER !!!

Here’s what I learned

Children are flexible, minds can be changed

Children see things in different ways than adults which can be pleasant

Children like routines... Mishelle was not much of a bath kid but once she discovered bubble baths... HOOKED!!

Children need dogs... Yes it’s like another child, but dogs provide unconditional love….Who doesn’t need that? Rescue one or just borrow one

Children find wonder in the ordinary

Children force you to slow down.

Even children uninterested in reading, enjoy bedtime stories, routine is everything

Some things can wait. Children cannot

Finally, they grow up... Far, Far too quickly

So thank you, caregivers for doing such remarkable jobs, especially when I now know what is facing you at home. Every day !

Bless you all for bringing your skills and your spirits to our very important work . Now go take a bubble bath. ■